Wonderfully Made

As a young woman, this verse hits hard to home. Many women struggle with body image from the time they are in elementary school until they have children of their own. It would be a complete lie if I told you I've never had my own struggle with body image. To this day, I still struggle with it. Today's society teaches us that beautiful is defined by your pant size, how much makeup you have on, the color and cut of your hair, and brand of clothing. I recently watched Colbie Caillat's new music video "Try." I have no doubt in my mind that any female can relate to this video.

My entire life I have tried. I've tried so so so hard. My junior year of high school, I tried so hard that my health, mind, and body were put at risk. October of my junior year I weighed 145 pounds. By June of 2010, I weight right in at 110 pounds. This was made possible by not eating and throwing up whatever I did eat. I passed out at a school event and was taken to the ER, my menstrual  cycle was becoming irregular, you could see my bones when I would wear a bikini (my mom cried when I was trying on swim suits while shopping for spring break...that bad), the list could continue for awhile.

Beginning of junior year....

....end of junior year

Granted, I had other things going on in my life at the time that were a cause of the weight loss. At the beginning people would tell me how I looked great losing all of this weight. I had finally accomplished my goal for so many years....I was skinny and people noticed! In my mind this was "wonderfully made." How sick was I to think this?! By July of that summer, my parents gave me the intervention I deserved. I went to a counselor to deal with my problems and started to eat right. I can honestly say if it weren't for them, I would have kept spiraling out of control.

I now weigh in at 130 pounds and I'm happier than ever. I still have issues with my weight. I am guilty of asking for compliments if I look skinny or not. When my family was recently at the beach, my mom finally told me how it is. Did I stomp down the beach in anger after that conversation? Of course. Ever since our talk, I've reflected on the past couple years. This past year was the first time I finally stopped trying. I exercised because I wanted to, ate healthy food because it actually tasted good, and indulged when I felt like it. If you've struggled like I have, I encourage you to accept your flaws. Who you are today is the best person you can be. God gave you the body you have for a reason. You are beautiful, wonderfully made, and always enough in His eyes.